How To Become Batman Reloaded – Using Tech Gadgets
**Warning. Trying to become a real life vigilante will most likely put you on a path to jail, torture, rape, or death. If you have ever had the honor of meeting a psychotic criminal you will hopefully understand that torture, rape, or death are some of the best scenarios that could come out of interfering with a crime. Appreviews4u does not promote or condone illegal activities. It is also not responsible for anything you do or do not do as a result of reading this article.
Now that the boring part is over letâ??s talking about becoming Batman! Naturally you have to understand that being a real life vigilante in its self is fiction. Once you get all the fancy gadgets and suits you would probably never witness a crime, let alone have a chance to step in and stop it. Of course you can suit yourself up with heavy suits and bullet proof helmets but when it comes down to it you wonâ??t be able to run from criminals and the police. Also you wonâ??t even need a bat mobile; real life has something called trafficâ?¦ This is something no one has been able to fix so far without the use of an expensive helicopter…
Instead you will be more of a hardened ex-cop like Max Payne or a lonely depressed man living in Manhattan such as Travis Bickle (Robert De Niro) from Taxi Driver. Usually someone chooses a life of crime or a life of law enforcement on the streets. You would have to hate crime and lawÂ enforcementÂ so much that you would not want to be part of either side, but rather both. That’s the trueÂ essenceÂ of a vigilante. Think Punisher and Kill Bill.
To become a vigilante you will have to have some prerequisites. Any extra languages you can speak, martial arts, meditation (clearness of mind), wittiness, ability to blend in, assume identities, and living a private life will likely help you. Generally there aren’t any specific steps to becoming a vigilante but we shall assume that you will have to be a bit more advanced than the regular human at accomplishing tasks. You will have to be a humanoid.
You will have to keep up with articles relating to new weapons and technologies. Your self-defense must be extraordinary. You will need an understanding of the police system, corrupt drug/prostitution groups, and federal/international laws, etc. Being a professional in a certain field such as forensics, law, science, engineering, or hacking will generally make or break you as a vigilante. You will need to understand the basics of these fields to even consider being a vigilante, and others things such as criminology, anatomy, human psychology, negotiation, and phlebotomy/first aid techniques.
Your body is your most advanced weapon you will have at your disposal. A vigilante will take punches and kicks to the head and groin. If you arenâ??t cut out for getting the snot beat out of you, then the job of being a vigilante is not right for you. Learn hand to hand combat from a qualified teacher, such as someone with Special Forces training. You will have to learn ways to neutralize enemies and possibly kill them if the need be. Become familiar with skills like breaking holds and throws. Your skills will have to be so refined that you can punch a vital organ or cripple someone on reflex if they turn on you.
Practice fighting multiple enemies at the same time. Chances are you will encounter five enemies at one point in the future, how will you neutralize them? Learn how to disarm enemies and always practice with a professional teacher. Your enemies will be fighting to the death. There is no lost pride in using dirty moves and there is no such thing as a dirty move for a criminal. In an enemyâ??s head itâ??s either you or him, and he will do whatever it takes to win. So make sure you practice in similar scenarios.
Tune your body into a specific â??niche.â? Will you be a heavy set man capable of lifting two wounded victims? Will you be a fit runner capable of parkouring and running long distances? Train for a specific niche and make sure you are the best at it. If you arenâ??t chances are you are going to end up in jail, tortured, raped, dead, or even worseâ?¦
You will need to be a professional at using pistols, machine guns, rifles, grenades, etc. Once again it is recommended you learn everything from a hardened wartime veteran with the necessary experience. He will be able to aid you in guerilla warfare that includes silent movement, torture, ammunitions, escape, silent weapons, and ways to neutralize an enemy.
You will need have to have a network of connections from your previous career. Hopefully you have connections that are able to get you the necessary weapons/training that you require.
Observation and Concentration
Most of the time things are spoken really quickly and people act in certain ways. Make sure to observe everything and find the patterns. Write down any important notes that you should not forget. Save evidence and don’t contaminate anything.
This is the most important part of your entire vigilante operations. If you are too slow you might get caught, if you are too light you might get shot… Obviously different situations require appropriate gear. Generally you will need armor that fits under normal civilian clothes and does not attract attention. A Kevlar helmet would not really blend in with othersâ?¦ For example these claws would be very helpful but would destroy your mobility and ability to not attract attention.
You will need the best and lightest body armor can buy, Dragon Skin. It is the lightest and most effective Kevlar armor out there that comes with trauma plates built in. You will need to wear this under anything you put on.
Depending on what you will be doing you will most likely need gloves or gauntlets. There are many different alternatives and Kevlar options but you will have to consider mobility over protection.
Also keep in mind that leather gloves are unique and have â??fingerprintsâ? that can be recorded and tracked across scenesâ?¦ Change leather gloves every other day. You will also need an appropriate utility belt or holsters for your equipment.
Kevlar groin protector. That should say it all.
You will need Kevlar boots as well. You know, the type that offer awesome traction and yet are still rough enough to stomp an enemy? You wonâ??t go wrong with jungle combat boots.
As for the classical cape you might want to skip it. Obviously it will give your vigilante status away but also consider that a cape could get stuck in a door. At which moment you would probably be:
- Taken to prison
- Tortured by angry criminals
- Raped by angry criminalsâ?? pet lion
- Killed by angry criminals or corrupt cops
- All of the above
Although you can buy fire resistant silk which may come in handy; you will probably want to just pass on the cape. Instead you should have all of your clothes custom tailored with fire resistant silk and Kevlar thread so it doesnâ??t tear/catch on fire. Did I mention criminals like soaking people in gasoline and burningÂ them alive?
You may also want to carry around a folding grappling hook in a bookbag just in case you ever have to rappel off a building.
Smoke and stun grenades are a must. You will also require protective goggles. What will you need those from you ask?
Your very own deadly blinding laser dazzler! You arenâ??t going to bringing along a puny laser attachment for your gun, but instead a military grade laser that can blind enemies for more than twenty minutes (You can permanently blind people as well, but just donâ??t piss off the UN!).
Also make sure you never actually blind yourself. It is quite easy to do so seeing that we live in a world with so much glass and mirrors. The best part about this tool is that you can blind hundreds of enemies in seemingly seconds. Take cover and then stun grenade everyone. Great tactics right?
You will also need heavy-duty cable zip ties to tie down blinded, puking, andÂ deliriousÂ enemies.
Another gadget you can never get enough of is bear mace. You could also possibly make a bear mace grenade? Iâ??m not so sure on the details but Iâ??m pretty sure things such as this would come in handyâ?¦
As for a gun you shouldnâ??t really carry more than two pistols and ammunition with you. Honestly if I were to become a real life vigilante I wouldnâ??t stop short of anything but dual 9mm Glocks and two other long range pistols (one silenced). It is reportedly hard to use two Glocks at the same time so you might want to start practicing that:
From what I understand the man using the Glocks in the video above was not experiencing trouble from the high recoil but rather because he didn’t have a good theme song playing (such as Tears from Max Payne 3). Any theme song from Kill Bill should do as well.
Of course we donâ??t actually condone or promote killing anyone but you should always have a failsafe. The least you could do is put yourself out of misery so you donâ??t end up in jail, tortured, raped, or worse.
Also you will need some knives such as the Gerber Mark II, disposable rubber gloves, and cowls/ski masks.
The last tool you will need is a camera which you can use to record illegal activities or fights that occur on your daily adventures. You can pass the information on to police or use it to legally defend yourself. You may also need a cell phone to call the police in the case that something is in over your head. Seeing that you would follow an online article for instructions on becoming a vigilante; you might want to have a good cell phone with you 😀
You can make yourself anything you want to be. For a classical investigatorâ??s appearance we would recommend wearing something a little professional, like Hitman. If you are say, trying to infiltrate a drug cartel you might want to go with fake vegetable tattoos and fake scars/brandings. Wear moles and other distractors that people are most likely to remember so they donâ??t remember more important features such as your jawline or ears.
Generally you would want your face to be covered by a moustache, etc. Think Jason Statham from Transporter (notice theÂ extremelyÂ thinÂ stubleÂ hiding his facial features [sarcasm]).
A vigilante could in theory just walk around with a police scanner and hunt down criminals; but that will never get you anywhere. If you can tap offical police communications or obtain classified information then you are on your way to kicking criminal butt. You can also try to infiltrate criminal groups which is highly dangerous and not recommended due to the high chances of rape, death, or torture.
Think of the movie Taken, Harry Brown, or the Girl with The Dragon Tattoo to get an idea of a realistic vigilante and how they might find criminals. You could also watch Hitman and The International for further inspiration.
The best scenario is that you are a cop but also do umm… work outside of cop work. Think Black Dynamite.
In the case that you will be cleaning up the streets outside of the law you should probably do it in another city or country. Being a cop and a vigilante is not something you can easily manage. Even if you’re not a cop, you should never perform vigilante activities in your own town. People will quickly catch onto your true identity.
Batman was inspired by the death of his parents, Beatrix Kiddo was motivated by revenge, and in Taken the main character needed to find his abducted daughter. If you are becoming a vigilante chances are you donâ??t really have anything to live for in the first place other than helping people. Try to refrain from drinking, drugs, or hookers because those will deteriorate your body and ability to kick crimeâ??s butt.
Just Become a Cop
Becoming a cop is probably the right choice for anyone looking to be a vigilante. To be a vigilante you most likely want to die helping the world become a better place with no outlook on anything else. Becoming a vigilante is either a scenario where you donâ??t care about life anymore; or you hate working within the law and letting so many bad guys go on for too long. At any rate being a vigilante is risky work. Remember your morals and always beÂ stylish.
Article written by Octavian Ristea.Â
I understand Batman would never use guns or blinding lasers; but I was just thinking about the real world. I don’t think Batman ever had to worry about going to jail, being tortured, raped, or killed. For example if you were trying to infiltrate Joseph Kony’s army ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joseph_Kony ) two glocks and pistols would be way too little firepower.
For those type of operations I would recommend something a little more advanced say a “Prototype Quadrotor with Machine Gun” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNPJMk2fgJU or a tank http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vvkLaa9bogU&feature=relmfu
Also for training I would recommend Russian baseball. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G5pPX-NlhIU&feature=relmfu
I just subscribed to the mad Russian guy’s YouTube channel Octavian – crazy stuff. Thanks for your excellent post and also for the nutty Russian link there 🙂
I can’t believe he stood that close to explosives that put a metre deep hole in the ground :Amazed:
Yeah I can never get enough of his videos! Showed them to all my friends and I always keep watching them. He’s a really funny guy. I would really like to swap lives with him even for a day 😛
I would have to agree with the ears 😀 The only person crazy enough to wear them is a crazy person! It may give you a couple of seconds while the criminal wonders what the hell you are doing; but I guess it also gives you away and makes you look like a dork.
For gaining a few moments time I would recommend practicing a demon voice and pretending you are either “batshit crazy” or “possessed”.
**Grrrrrr….. We are GEMINI!!!** :Happy-Birthday2:
An extra piece of advice for anyone out there running around in a cape & listening to police radio channels . . . lose the bat ears . . . No matter how prepared you are, no one will take you seriously with a couple of bat ears sticking out of your head 😉
Talk about a silenced pistol 🙂 http://i327.photobucket.com/albums/k467/rapier1772/CIMG2171.jpg
Lol look what I’m getting for recommended items now! http://prntscr.com/f5pjd
Wow, I think you are now on the vigilante items list 🙂
If there was one person I’d require to survive during the zombie apocalypse (or a sidekick if I were a vigilante) it would be this woman.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K8nda8yPNbI&feature=related She can shoot guns!
Good sidekick choice! Wouldn’t like to get on the wrong side of her :O